Clomid Day 3

Today is Day 3 for my Clomid...and I have seen the evil Clomid brought to life, in me.

Last night I had a little bit of a meltdown. By meltdown I mean, a major attitude. Everything just felt annoying, and I was not capable of being rational and thinking things through. I had no desire to be nice or kind. This happened close to bedtime, and I always have a hard time at bedtime anyway. I think it's when I am not really tired, then I think about all the possibilities. Like "What if this cycle will not work?" "Why did I have to go through all this in the first place?" I tend to think about all things bad. Then mix in 200MG of Clomid, well...it's not good.

I have 4 more days to go, I pray that it will not get worse. But I am preparing myself for it to get worse.

I thought I had this Clomid under control, but it came out like a Lioness!! Of course I felt great this morning, no worries, no anxiety. But come tonight...I fear the dreaded hours of the late night!!

I scheduled my appointment for my ultrasound and blood work on CD 15. I will need to be there at 7am, and I need to have 32oz of water drank by 6am!!! I have no idea how I will get that much water down, that early! I get to go to a Clinic that is a lot closer than my Dr.'s office, so that is great. My Dr. wanted me to get this stuff done early so that they can get the results quicker.

Today I feel blessed that I don't feel sick on the Clomid!!

Infertility Update

I had a doctor appointment on Friday to follow-up on our 2nd month of Clomid. I had a great morning before the appointment, so I was in good spirits and OK with the low levels of progesterone that I knew I had. My doctor was also surprised that the levels did not significantly go up, but she said some people only need that next dosage to spike the levels. So she told me that we will try 150MG of Clomid this month along with the Provera to start my cycle. Then if my levels do not go up again, then they can no longer help us. We will then need to go to a larger infertility clinic, which is in Beachwood, OH a little over 1 hour from us. She said she does not know why the clomid is doing nothing for me, but hopefully the 150MG will be just enough to raise those levels. If not the larger Clinic has a lot more to offer, and a lot more tests they can run to see if there are any other issues, and also stronger drugs. So this next month will be very difficult for me. I have been letting my emotions get the best of me so much after my appointment yesterday. I really need to get my faith back to where it was, I feel like I just want to give up.

So I am going to get my cycle started right away, hopefully the 150MG of clomid won't kill me with side effects. I have a feeling those hot flashed might be paying me a visit.

Today I am thankful for a wonderful Doctor who has done everything possible to help us become parents.